This morning I got up as usual, had my coffee, took a shower, looked out the window and thought. It will be winter soon, Max come on let's take a walk. (Max, being my dog, who is also my best friend) So, I put on his coat even tho he did not need it and we set off.
He was chipper and I looked down and him and said, happy are you little guy? And I swear he smiled at me!!
I was only going to take a short walk, but as walks sometimes are a way for me to think, let off steam, or simply relax, I decided we would walk longer.
I am glad we did.
This has been an extremely hard year, and many things have happened which I have no control over.
I have always been able to problem solve and keep moving but the last two weeks have been hard. Well,,, we turned the corner and I heard the wind blowing in the trees, what a beautiful sound, then I watched the leaves and listened really listened to them rustle. I started to relax.
Then we crossed the street and walked next to a house that a young baby was crying from. Nothing serious was going on, just a young baby. Just? My mind then went to my two children who are grown and in my mind I could hear each one of them at some time, their little cries, their big cries. I thought to myself, why did I not cherish this more? They are older now, and I know I did a good job with them. They are both wonderful adults. I somehow managed to make them both independent. They are my greatest joys. I also have a wonderful husband who has stood by me in many times of pain and happiness. How lucky I am!
I have never been a person to speak up for myself, but as I am getting older I am finding that it is getting easier, because I know only I can make myself happy. If a friend gets mad at me now, I do not dwell, I just say to myself. This to shall pass. I cannot make myself sick over small events anymore. I have watched someone I love very much struggle with all her being, and she does not complain. She is an inspiration.
Before I got home I thought of my Mom and all the wonderful baking she did and how she entertained on very little money and very little space. So much fun was had in that small little basement. My short walk turned into a long one, but I came home feeling good.
I got out my bake things, and baked. I made a dinner my Dad could have had every night, and now I am going to read for a while. Life is good. I treasure my family, they are your lifeline. They accept you for you. I am one lucky lady. Enjoy the fall everyone. Listen to the trees and leaves!
