Thursday, January 20, 2011
Monday, January 17, 2011
The Molly in my life.
Molly, whoever thought that the beagle I thought Erin, Devin and Billy were bringing home was going to be not the little beagle I imagined but a beagle with huge feet, which instantly told me we were going to have a BIG dog.
Well, things started off rather quickly. We took Molly inside, and she promptly started telling us who was boss. We thought we could leave her alone. Wrong. The first time we left her alone, when we came home everything was out of the refrigerator! So we got a cage, wrong again, she got out of the cage. So we added a chain, wrong again, she was waiting for us upstairs when we entered the house. Oh, this was going to be fun.
There is no dog to compare, in my life, to Molly as far as getting the best of a human being.
She was a human...
So smart, so lovable, so strong, so bad.
But we loved her.
One day, when I had found out I needed to have my thyroid zapped out, so when I came home from the hospital, I was really nervous, because they gave me such a hard time at the hospital. I had an appointment with the city to inspect the house because I qualified for a grant to bring things up to code.
Well, when I got home, I could not get in the house. I locked the keys in the car!
So I climbed in the bedroom window, with Molly at the window the whole time, trying to drag me in. So drag me in she did. Right on the floor. The inspectors came and I forseeing trouble, shut her in the back bedroom. Well, the inspectors did what they had to do. So I went to let Molly out. I thought they were gone. Wrong. They were just going out the door. Off Molly took, I grabbed her by the collar thinking I could stop her. Wrong. She dragged me down the hall, to the door, I hit my head on the door, opening it, she dragged me down the steps onto the porch and then onto the sidewalk at the feet of the Wyandotte inspectors. I can just imagine what they had to say when they got back to the office!!
Another time, Erin and Devins father was picking up them for the evening. I was in the backyard with Molly, taking clothes off the line. Their Dad and I were in some sort of not talking mode , so I continued to do what I was doing. Well, Molly grabbed a pair of my underpants got them on and ran around and around the backyard, Bill and I could not help but laugh together because it was so very funny, seeing the brown and white "beagle" with my underwear on!
So as you can see Molly was an adventure. We were always looking for her. One Christmas Eve was spent with 4 teams looking for her, only to discover she circled around and was at the back gate.
I have had dogs my whole life, but never one quite as smart as Molly.
She was there when I was lonely, sad, scared, happy, sick. Always.
We lost Molly in January of 2005, ten years after my kids brought her home.
It was right around this time. I think it was the 14th. What a horrible day.
Saying goodbye to Molly was so hard. She died at home. Devin, Erin and I at her side. With Erin pleading with me to give her CPR and Devin having to tell us to help her die. She gave her last breath, and with her my heart gave away a piece.
I will always remember her as will my family. If only we all could have such a great dog.
I know she is creating havoc in heaven with Chevis, Molly Sue, Buster and any other dog she can bully.
Love you still, Molly girl. Always will
Well, things started off rather quickly. We took Molly inside, and she promptly started telling us who was boss. We thought we could leave her alone. Wrong. The first time we left her alone, when we came home everything was out of the refrigerator! So we got a cage, wrong again, she got out of the cage. So we added a chain, wrong again, she was waiting for us upstairs when we entered the house. Oh, this was going to be fun.
There is no dog to compare, in my life, to Molly as far as getting the best of a human being.
She was a human...
So smart, so lovable, so strong, so bad.
But we loved her.
One day, when I had found out I needed to have my thyroid zapped out, so when I came home from the hospital, I was really nervous, because they gave me such a hard time at the hospital. I had an appointment with the city to inspect the house because I qualified for a grant to bring things up to code.
Well, when I got home, I could not get in the house. I locked the keys in the car!
So I climbed in the bedroom window, with Molly at the window the whole time, trying to drag me in. So drag me in she did. Right on the floor. The inspectors came and I forseeing trouble, shut her in the back bedroom. Well, the inspectors did what they had to do. So I went to let Molly out. I thought they were gone. Wrong. They were just going out the door. Off Molly took, I grabbed her by the collar thinking I could stop her. Wrong. She dragged me down the hall, to the door, I hit my head on the door, opening it, she dragged me down the steps onto the porch and then onto the sidewalk at the feet of the Wyandotte inspectors. I can just imagine what they had to say when they got back to the office!!
Another time, Erin and Devins father was picking up them for the evening. I was in the backyard with Molly, taking clothes off the line. Their Dad and I were in some sort of not talking mode , so I continued to do what I was doing. Well, Molly grabbed a pair of my underpants got them on and ran around and around the backyard, Bill and I could not help but laugh together because it was so very funny, seeing the brown and white "beagle" with my underwear on!
So as you can see Molly was an adventure. We were always looking for her. One Christmas Eve was spent with 4 teams looking for her, only to discover she circled around and was at the back gate.
I have had dogs my whole life, but never one quite as smart as Molly.
She was there when I was lonely, sad, scared, happy, sick. Always.
We lost Molly in January of 2005, ten years after my kids brought her home.
It was right around this time. I think it was the 14th. What a horrible day.
Saying goodbye to Molly was so hard. She died at home. Devin, Erin and I at her side. With Erin pleading with me to give her CPR and Devin having to tell us to help her die. She gave her last breath, and with her my heart gave away a piece.
I will always remember her as will my family. If only we all could have such a great dog.
I know she is creating havoc in heaven with Chevis, Molly Sue, Buster and any other dog she can bully.
Love you still, Molly girl. Always will
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Pay it Forward
Last night Jerry and I watched a movie "Pay it Forward". The main thought was a teacher giving an assignment to his class about changing the world. A young boy decided to start "Pay it Forward" meaning if you do a good thing for someone and they ask you how they can thank you enough, you just tell them, Do something good for three people, which they all do through the movie. His idea worked so well, it went all the way to California.
In life, we all have these people who do things for us and little do we realize the impact they have made on us.
My daughter, Erin McGill Beard, is an excellent writer, photographer, lover of animals. She believes in giving her gifts to the world.
She wrote a column the other day on her blog about author Pat Conroy.
She wrote how her love of books changed her life. Which is exactly what this new book of Pat Conroy's is about.
Got me to thinking:
First memory of really enjoying a good story was in third grade, could not wait for my teacher to read the next chapter of whatever book she chose to read that week. Her voice, her manner. Captiviated me.
My Dad and sister always took my brother and I to the Wyandotte Library. The Old Wyandotte library. With all of its history and grandness. We were deposited in the childrens library while they went on their way. I way on my way to a great change in my life.
The first book I read that challenged me to explore further was The Diary of Anne Frank. Her life during World War II in an attic with other Jewish families, stirred something in me. I read everything I could about the Holocaust and was deeply moved by the evil in the world. How can man be so cruel to man?
Next, Gone With The Wind, was the book that also changed my life. I found everything there was to read about the Civil War. Stephen Ambrose, Ashley Foote, devoured them all. Margaret Mitchell, through her story, told of the horror of the Civil War, but she also chose a heroine who became important to me. Scarlett O'hara. The romance of the era, the cause, the dreams. I stepped back in time. My daughter will often say how when she was at Getteysburg, she remarked, "My mom could do this tour" We went there one summer and it was a wonderful memory for me. I knew all my favorite generals and she patiently helped me find their monuments. For being from the North somehow I fell in love with Gen. Lee and Longstreet and Pickett. From the North, it was Chamberlain. All wonderful generals, with different ideals and dreams. All thinking they were right. Scarlett O'hara, fought for herself and her family. And although my whole life I wished I was more like the soft, gentle Melanie, I have found myself to be more like Scarlett. With that strong will to survive. My nephew Brian, also is a deep lover of the Civil War and its stories. I wonder if he has ever read Gone With The Wind?
When my daughter was three, off we would go, her on the back of my bike. With lunch packed and put in the basket, we would ride to the Wyandotte Library. Pick out books and go to Bishop Park and we would read. What fun and what a way to pay it forward. My Dad and Sister, My daughter and I. She loves to read. Has always loved to read and writes about the books so beautifully. I like to think I may have had something to do with that.
Books can take you anywhere. The only time I am completely relaxed is when I am reading a good book. I am in the moment. I am in whatever state I am reading about, I never got to travel much, but through books, I have seen and learned much.
Biographies, I love them. Mystery, I try to solve them. Love Alex Cross. Just read the James Patterson book about Alex Cross's roots and about his grandfather during the bad slave times and what went on.
The Help, wonderful book. Opens your eyes.
Sometimes, I wish I had the talent of so many wonderful writers, including Erin. There is so much I need to say. But I am quiet, do not like attention. That is why I am writing this blog. My daughter encouraged me. I love it. I have always kept journals. When I am gone, my children will find them all over the place.
Summation: Pay it forward. It may change someones life forever.
In life, we all have these people who do things for us and little do we realize the impact they have made on us.
My daughter, Erin McGill Beard, is an excellent writer, photographer, lover of animals. She believes in giving her gifts to the world.
She wrote a column the other day on her blog about author Pat Conroy.
She wrote how her love of books changed her life. Which is exactly what this new book of Pat Conroy's is about.
Got me to thinking:
First memory of really enjoying a good story was in third grade, could not wait for my teacher to read the next chapter of whatever book she chose to read that week. Her voice, her manner. Captiviated me.
My Dad and sister always took my brother and I to the Wyandotte Library. The Old Wyandotte library. With all of its history and grandness. We were deposited in the childrens library while they went on their way. I way on my way to a great change in my life.
The first book I read that challenged me to explore further was The Diary of Anne Frank. Her life during World War II in an attic with other Jewish families, stirred something in me. I read everything I could about the Holocaust and was deeply moved by the evil in the world. How can man be so cruel to man?
Next, Gone With The Wind, was the book that also changed my life. I found everything there was to read about the Civil War. Stephen Ambrose, Ashley Foote, devoured them all. Margaret Mitchell, through her story, told of the horror of the Civil War, but she also chose a heroine who became important to me. Scarlett O'hara. The romance of the era, the cause, the dreams. I stepped back in time. My daughter will often say how when she was at Getteysburg, she remarked, "My mom could do this tour" We went there one summer and it was a wonderful memory for me. I knew all my favorite generals and she patiently helped me find their monuments. For being from the North somehow I fell in love with Gen. Lee and Longstreet and Pickett. From the North, it was Chamberlain. All wonderful generals, with different ideals and dreams. All thinking they were right. Scarlett O'hara, fought for herself and her family. And although my whole life I wished I was more like the soft, gentle Melanie, I have found myself to be more like Scarlett. With that strong will to survive. My nephew Brian, also is a deep lover of the Civil War and its stories. I wonder if he has ever read Gone With The Wind?
When my daughter was three, off we would go, her on the back of my bike. With lunch packed and put in the basket, we would ride to the Wyandotte Library. Pick out books and go to Bishop Park and we would read. What fun and what a way to pay it forward. My Dad and Sister, My daughter and I. She loves to read. Has always loved to read and writes about the books so beautifully. I like to think I may have had something to do with that.
Books can take you anywhere. The only time I am completely relaxed is when I am reading a good book. I am in the moment. I am in whatever state I am reading about, I never got to travel much, but through books, I have seen and learned much.
Biographies, I love them. Mystery, I try to solve them. Love Alex Cross. Just read the James Patterson book about Alex Cross's roots and about his grandfather during the bad slave times and what went on.
The Help, wonderful book. Opens your eyes.
Sometimes, I wish I had the talent of so many wonderful writers, including Erin. There is so much I need to say. But I am quiet, do not like attention. That is why I am writing this blog. My daughter encouraged me. I love it. I have always kept journals. When I am gone, my children will find them all over the place.
Summation: Pay it forward. It may change someones life forever.
Sunday, January 9, 2011
"And we all Shine On"
December 2010...... and here I am thinking, how to get through when you feel so sad?
Me, Miss Christmas Carol herself was like the new bah humbug of Christmas 2010. What was I going to do? My wonderful husband wanted the tree up, I, who usually can't wait, waited. But I put it up, decorated it, decorated the house. Jerry put lights up outside. The whole nine yards. But in my mind all the time, Who is going to see this, not having a big Christmas Eve at my house this year, knew I was not going to get much quality time with my two wonderful children and stepson. Ok, Linda, why are you doing all this? But I did, and continued to do the usual, baked, shopped, wrapped, planned, kept right on moving Dad just like you always told me.
Bryce had died, only 18, Erin's husband was laid off 2 weeks before Christmas, and they are trying to adopt, Lori is in pain, cousins had died the past few years, family members, one most beloved has been sick all year and was facing so much. How do you be happy, at the happiest time of the year?
Well, one night, I was laying on the couch, watching "It a Wonderful Life" with Jerry, because he insisted. Would'nt watch Home for the Holidays this year at Thanksgiving, but I laid down and prepared to watch "Its a Wonderful Life".
Halfway into the movie, I looked over at the tree.
Just looked.
Then, suddenly one light shone extra bright. One light, I though, no you are just seeing things. Then another, and another. And a thought entered my mind: one bright light, Bryce, two bright lights, Mom, three bright lights, Dad. All the bright lights turned into all my family who I was missing and they were telling me,
Shine On, Linda Shine on.
Then I thought of Jesus, That one bright light, Christmas Eve, when he was born.
All of our lights shine brightly, but they dim out the same as Jesus did. Only he came back to give us hope for all the tomorrows.
Then I started to enjoy things more. Jerry and I shopped together, we even baked together! I am blessed to have my children come see me when they can. We had a wonderful time at Greenfield Village on Devins birthday. Erin,Billy, Devin, Chrissy, Michelle and Jerry and I. It was great. Had a great shopping day with my girls, my sister and Michelle. Went and walked around Frankenmuth with Lori and Todd. During sad times we had good times. Our Hills and our Valleys.
Christmas Eve, my sister surprised me and came to church during the service. She said my eyes lit up when I saw her. My heart lit up! Then we had a quiet Christmas Eve dinner, just the four of us, Jerry, myself and Barb and Art. And guess what, it was nice, in fact it was perfect!
Believe me, this really happened with the lights. And although I am still struggling with the good ole things that come with old age and the horrible death of Bryce I realize now we must always shine on.
"And we all shine on,
Like the moon and stars and the sun
We must all shine on" John Lennon
Me, Miss Christmas Carol herself was like the new bah humbug of Christmas 2010. What was I going to do? My wonderful husband wanted the tree up, I, who usually can't wait, waited. But I put it up, decorated it, decorated the house. Jerry put lights up outside. The whole nine yards. But in my mind all the time, Who is going to see this, not having a big Christmas Eve at my house this year, knew I was not going to get much quality time with my two wonderful children and stepson. Ok, Linda, why are you doing all this? But I did, and continued to do the usual, baked, shopped, wrapped, planned, kept right on moving Dad just like you always told me.
Bryce had died, only 18, Erin's husband was laid off 2 weeks before Christmas, and they are trying to adopt, Lori is in pain, cousins had died the past few years, family members, one most beloved has been sick all year and was facing so much. How do you be happy, at the happiest time of the year?
Well, one night, I was laying on the couch, watching "It a Wonderful Life" with Jerry, because he insisted. Would'nt watch Home for the Holidays this year at Thanksgiving, but I laid down and prepared to watch "Its a Wonderful Life".
Halfway into the movie, I looked over at the tree.
Just looked.
Then, suddenly one light shone extra bright. One light, I though, no you are just seeing things. Then another, and another. And a thought entered my mind: one bright light, Bryce, two bright lights, Mom, three bright lights, Dad. All the bright lights turned into all my family who I was missing and they were telling me,
Shine On, Linda Shine on.
Then I thought of Jesus, That one bright light, Christmas Eve, when he was born.
All of our lights shine brightly, but they dim out the same as Jesus did. Only he came back to give us hope for all the tomorrows.
Then I started to enjoy things more. Jerry and I shopped together, we even baked together! I am blessed to have my children come see me when they can. We had a wonderful time at Greenfield Village on Devins birthday. Erin,Billy, Devin, Chrissy, Michelle and Jerry and I. It was great. Had a great shopping day with my girls, my sister and Michelle. Went and walked around Frankenmuth with Lori and Todd. During sad times we had good times. Our Hills and our Valleys.
Christmas Eve, my sister surprised me and came to church during the service. She said my eyes lit up when I saw her. My heart lit up! Then we had a quiet Christmas Eve dinner, just the four of us, Jerry, myself and Barb and Art. And guess what, it was nice, in fact it was perfect!
Believe me, this really happened with the lights. And although I am still struggling with the good ole things that come with old age and the horrible death of Bryce I realize now we must always shine on.
"And we all shine on,
Like the moon and stars and the sun
We must all shine on" John Lennon
Monday, January 3, 2011
Divine spark
A new year is here. What is it that makes our years come and go and leave us feeling somewhat if not downright sad? I think all of us have it in us to make a better way for ourselves, and we really try. But sometimes, the fates have it in for us. So, what do we do? We have to have that spark of courage to move on and hope for better times. What worse than to lose a child? A job? Hope for adoption to be slowed down by some bad timing? Where is this divine spark that shines?
My own experience is time. I have had many dark moments in my life, only to come through them, with a greater understanding of what life is.
People, I will never understand. Being the sensitive person I have always been, I take to much to heart and get hurt. When someone I know is hurting, I try to call, visit, or send a card. Not all people are like that. Silence is NOT golden. It causes pain and confusion.
All I can hope for in this year ahead, is I make the right choices, help my family, and try to continue to care about others. That is all we all can do after all, isn't it?
My own experience is time. I have had many dark moments in my life, only to come through them, with a greater understanding of what life is.
People, I will never understand. Being the sensitive person I have always been, I take to much to heart and get hurt. When someone I know is hurting, I try to call, visit, or send a card. Not all people are like that. Silence is NOT golden. It causes pain and confusion.
All I can hope for in this year ahead, is I make the right choices, help my family, and try to continue to care about others. That is all we all can do after all, isn't it?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)